and 10 glowing rings, clutching a potion bottle, and laden with all
manner of weapons, magical devices, and sacks of gold, lies panting on
the ground outside of the seedy-looking entrance to a grimy Dungeon.
The nearby scenery is uniformly grey and uninteresting.
Bluff Male Voice: Retrieved the Amulet of Yendor too many times to count?
Sultry Female Voice: Can't see anything in the Eye of Larn?
BMV: Eaten one too many Zombie corpses?
SFV: Run out of Greater Gods to kill?
CLOSE-UP: The ADVENTURER's sweat-streaked face, which is nicked and bruised. He has a black eye.
The ADVENTURER nods wearily, and, it seems, with some boredom.
MBV+SFV: Then take the ultimate challenge ... The final quest ... OMEGA!
(PAN VERTICALLY TOWARD SKY)
The Mormon Tabernacle Choir: Ooooooo -- mega!
A shaft of brilliant sunlight pierces the overcast sky, revealing a Mystic Portal in the sky. A rainbow bridge lances from the portal toward the ADVENTURER. As the ADVENTURER hesitantly sets foot on the bridge, he (with the viewer) is swept through the M.P. in a masterpiece of computer animation. There is a flash of light, and a TRANSFORMED ADVENTURER, in newly polished and chromed armor, wielding a flaming sword, strides confidently toward an edifice that makes the Castle of Ultimate Darkness look like a sandcastle. The landscape is vibrantly colored, and we feel that there are new challenges awaiting just over the horizon.
TMTC: Magnificat! Magnificat! Magnificat!
BMV: Coming Soon to a site near you!
SFV: Challenge Omega -- The Final Quest!
As the ADVENTURER passes through the entrance to the AWESOME CASTLE, a giant portcullis slams shut behind him with the force of a Death Star bulkhead, and we hear a muffled scream, soon cut off.
Satanic Male Voice: If you dare! <laughs insanely>